+00:06
I already have a feeling I got the amphetamine today. Not necessarily because I have a lot of energy, that’s probably just due to finally getting enough sleep and Ch-Check It Out by the Beastie Boys playing on my iPod. It’s more just a process of elimination thing. 2 sessions down and 2 to go and I’m almost positive I haven’t had the upper yet.
So I filled out the first “How Are You Feeling Now?” survey and discovered I’m in a really good mood today. (This was before I’d taken any capsules.) Turns out a lot of things can affect you like a drug. Music is one for sure, but today I didn’t listen to music on the train ride here. Instead I listened to a book on tape, audio-book to be politically correct (I don’t want to offend any cassettes). I realized I can “read” so many books on my countless train rides. Last night and this morning I’ve been listening to “How To Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnagy. Regardless of how it may sound, I’m not really reading this to help make friends in the new city. That’s not really what it’s about. It’s more a book about interpersonal communication. So far if I had to rename the book I think I’d call it “How to get what you want from people by Giving them what they want.” That’s a long title, but it seems fitting. The 1st chapter talked about how you shouldn’t criticize people because it will only cause them to become defensive. The 2nd chapter’s about how you should tell people when they’re doing something good or right. All too often the good things people do, even if they’re noticed, go unmentioned. It advises against “flatter” because this is usually an attempt to give some one a generic compliment for your own benefits.
+00:40
Instead you should look at them honestly and discover their good qualities, which everyone has, then you can give them genuine compliments.
Anyway, it’s a good book with a lot of good historical examples to show what he’s talking about in real life instances. The hour and a half I’ve listened to so far has already encouraged me to try and better myself and my people skills, for lack of a better term. While feeling out the “How Do You Feel Now” survey, I realized what a good mood I’m in. Sure part of it’s probably do to being well rested, getting out of the apartment, the little bit of coffee I drank this morning, and the awesome week I had hanging out with Lisa, Shea, Norm, and Karl, but I also think a large part of my current optimistic mood came from this book that I was (fake) reading.
Reading Is My Anti-Drug! (But I enjoy reading much more when I’m on drugs…just kidding)
I feel way better than I did during the last session. Pretty much the exact opposite. Awake, energetic, and “full-of-pep” as the survey puts it. The problem is I never really know if it’s because of the capsules I’m taking or the mood I was already in. Oh well, I guess that’s not really a problem.
+01:10
It’s the Upper! Like I say, I was well rested and semi-energetic anyway, but nonetheless I feel this is the most sure I’ve been of any of the 3 studies. At the end of the 4 sessions I find out what I took each session and if this is placebo I’ll admit I’m wrong and actually feel good that I feel this “Up” on placebo, but I would bet money that this is no placebo.
Hellogoodbye’s “All of your Love” is playing on my iPod. This is the perfect kind of music for how I’m feeling right now…but then again, I felt the same way when DMX or the Beastie Boys, or now Eminem came on…pretty much anything upbeat. Oh man, this is awesome. Fuck This Is Awesome! Don’t think I’m some druggy. I’m doing this all legally…AND getting paid for it! Man, being unemployed is awesome. I’ve said that aa lot this week. 2 separate occasions I was laying in the sun on the beach. Once with Karl, once with Lisa. Lisa was cuter. Speaking of Lisa and Hellogoodbye, we’re going to see them in Albuquerque next month! That’s right, you heard it here first. I’m flying in next month for my sister Rachel’s Birthday. She said she’d pay for my flight to have her little brother there on her birthday. I love that girl. I love all the people in that family (my family). Enough Love talk, it’s starting to sound like I’m on ecstasy. That wasn’t one of the drugs they were testing.
+01:43
So I just finished the cognitive and reaction time puzzles for this session. I think I did pretty well. Nothing too incredible, but perhaps slightly better than usual. Definitely better than last week. The effect from the capsules are wearing off. I’m not as hyper and energetic, but I still feel pretty good. My head’s tingling a little bit. Goodbye Upper. You will be missed.
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